Relationships

No Groupie Formed Against Me Shall Prosper: Guidelines For A Successful Relationship With A Creative 

Ok. If you’re reading this you either date a creative or you want to date one. So here’s the real deal. Dating a creative can be one of the most beautiful things in the world. Whether your significant other is a singer, dancer, designer, rapper, painter, producer (or anything else in the creative realm) dating a creative is awesome because you get a front row seat to watch the person you like do something they love. Sounds pretty perfect right?

Not all the time.

A lot of the time, from the outside looking in, people may assume that dating someone who is pursuing a career in the art or entertainment industry is simple and “fun”. Some may even go after an individual strictly for their status in their field (a terrible idea). Many of these relationships end up failing not only because people get into them for the wrong reasons, but also because certain things aren’t understood from day one. If done correctly, dating a creative can be a beautiful process. Here are some guidelines to help your relationship with a creative to be a success.

1. Be their number one fan.

img_0096
No. Not this kind.
This may seem obvious but as hard as it may be to believe, many creatives are in relationships with individuals who don’t support their craft. Why would you date someone when you aren’t interested in the very thing that they consider their passion? The answer is unknown, yet it still happens. As a creative, (especially if you’re still on that underground, lesser known, local level) support means everything. Sometimes it can become discouraging performing in empty venues, not booking enough shoots a month, or not selling enough artwork. This is why it’s very that if you’re in a relationship with a creative you show active interest in their craft and support them 100 percent. Go to their shows. Look at their designs. Listen to their beats. Even things like a simple repost or share of their work can mean a lot. Showing a consistent, genuine interest in your significant artists work may mean the difference between a break up or a successful relationship.

2. Give them their space to work.

Don’t be that girl/guy.
One thing that a lot of people don’t seem to understand when noticing someone’s art or music or any other creative result is the amount of time and energy that goes into the process. While the results may be beautiful, the process itself can be long, grueling and sometimes draining. Your creative (if they’re serious about their craft)  is going to spend hours upon hours working on it so that they can present a quality product. They aren’t going to be able to lay up under you all day every day. They aren’t going to be able to sit on FaceTime all night. You can’t be “clingy” and have a successful relationship with an aspiring creative. It just won’t work. Understand that they need time and space to themselves to work. The best way to deal with this is to learn the schedule of the times they are dedicating to their craft and work around it. Sometimes they might want you to accompany them to that studio session or photo shoot, but other times they may want to be alone for focus purposes. Understand that and as long as they’re being reasonable, work with them and find a happy balance. It will pay off in the long run.

3. Understand that networking is not flirting.

Can. We. Not.
In order for your creative to make it beyond anything other than being a local artist, they’re going to have to do some talking. A lot of it. If you’re out at an event and you see your significant other talking and mingling with other artists or people in their field, don’t be that person to become jealous and cause a scene. Keep in mind that networking is the only way to become introduced to bigger and better platforms. A lot of times you may think something is something that it’s not. With that being said, open lines of communication are always a must. Don’t assume anything and always ask questions. Imagine snapping on your guy about that “girl with the tight dress” that he seemed to be talking to a lot at his show only to find out she was trying to get his information to send to a major record label in hopes of getting him signed. Ooooh. That’s embarrassing.

4. Fans and groupies come with the territory.

There’s so much wrong with this picture I’m not sure where to begin. But you get the idea.
If you’re dating someone who is talented, fans will come. And if you’re dating someone who is talented and is somewhat attractive, groupies will come. Watch how your significant other responds to them and respond accordingly. If you see them entertaining groupies as more than groupies then it may be best to leave. However, if you see that your significant other is paying these groupies no mind, then do the same. Fans and groupies are part of the territory and if your girl/guy isnt making them relevant then neither should you. Keep it moving and remember most of them are fighting for a title that you already have.

Creatives are interesting people and dating a creative can be even more interesting. Now that you’re aware of most of the ins and outs, you are now prepared to make your relationship with your creative a successful one.

One comment

  1. I am a real fan and everything you wrote makes perfect sense this is very well put together and very well thought of i feel like i could come to you for advice if need be 😍😍

    Like

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